letting myself flop in the kitchen.
failing is okay. failing is okay. failing is okay.
We love a learning moment. And I’ve had quite a few recently.
The biggest one has been (and am still learning) letting myself make choices, take risks, and be okay with failing.
For a lot of my life, I’ve been so afraid of failure, and even just being bad at something that I’d rather not try. I don’t want to risk embarrassing myself or not succeeding. I can only be so successful when I am only so comfortable. But then what’s the point of anything if I don’t try to grow…
So! I tried a new recipe and this was her journey.
I made Claire Saffitz’s sweet yeast dough (which almost flopped in itself, but we persevered). I knew I wanted to make some kind of cinnamon roll-adjacent pastry. I also wanted banana bread. And I wanted chocolate…and tahini.
It was ambitious. It was messy. But the process was fun and challenging and surprisingly rewarding. I almost didn’t even care that they didn’t taste that great. Almost.
You know when little kids draw or paint something kinda ugly but they’re so so proud of it? That’s what this felt like.
I’m proud because I tried something out of my comfort zone AND developed a new recipe. I want to feel proud of more risks, but in order to feel that way, I actually have to take the risks. And being okay with what happens next.
I remember as a kid how patient my Siti was when trying new things. She knew I was a minor perfectionist even when I was young. She always encouraged us to try and to give some grace for not having it perfect the first or fiftieth time.
This was incredibly true when it came to forming things like ma’amoul, grape leaves, or Syrian bread; things that now come like second nature.
Now crocheting…unfortunately, I tried multiple times and accepted failure.
Here’s to giving myself permission to fail!
With love,
Cara